I am in an abusive relationship, I want to leave but have no where to go

by Paula
(Maryland)

I have been in an abusive relationship with my children's father for 8 years. At first he wasn't so violent & mean but over the past few years it has gotten really bad. He has been a drug abuser since his early teens & continues to use & now he drinks boxes of wine on a weekly some times daily basis.

We now have three little boys ages 6, 3 & a new born premature baby. He is often violent towards me & my children. He has busted my nose, lips bruised my body & my two oldest boys.

Last month he fractured my finger & ironically we both ended up staying the night in jail because I placed a protection order against him & I was in his house.

I have tried leaving, in fact in September I left him but in December I had to come back because I could not find a stable home for my boys & my pregnancy was progressing.

I have tried shelters but as crazy as it sounds they would not take us because of a lack of space. I want so bad to leave but I have no money or anywhere to go.

Because I live in his house he manipulates me & threatens me so I have no choice but to give him my money making it hard for me to save & leave. I don't know what to do, I feel so alone & hopeless.

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I Have Tried Everything
by: Paula

I have tried every kind of shelter in different counties. In fact I just got off the phone with them again.

Last night he started fighting with me again because he wants me to give him $900 which I don't even have.

Earlier this month I had to give him $600. I don't know what to do. He manipulates me because I am staying in his house.

I just feel so hopeless. I wish I could leave but I have no where to go & I can't be out in the streets again, my baby is too small & delicate since he was a premature. He will be 2 months on the 11th.
Leaving An Abusive Relationship
by: Kelly Ann Evers

Dear Paula,

I am so sorry. The fear, the terror, the hopelessness you must face goes beyond words. I am hurting for you.

In my county alone 95 shelters closed because of lack of funds, so it doesn't surprise me they didn't have space.

Unfortunately that doesn't help you! Have you called the local police to ask them what they will do for you?


I see you live in Maryland, did you look at the shelters page (on the navigation bar to the left?) It's under "About Abuse."

Or cut and paste this:
https://www.domestic-violence-help.org/womens-shelters.html


Is this the place you stayed? if not here is another resource to help you get out.
Maryland Network Against Domestic Violence
6911 Laurel-Bowie Road, Suite 309
Bowie, MD 20715
(301) 352-4574 Fax: (301) 809-0422
(800) 634-3577 Nationwide
Website: www.mnadv.org
Email: info@mnadv.org

Also, if you dial 211 on your phone (some cell phones don't work, you need land lines in some states) you will get additional help on places to go.

Here is another resources: 800-799-SAFE

These can help you get going. If they don't have any helpful ideas, let me know and I will do some research for you too.

Paula, I know this is hard, and you've been going through this for 8 years, just stay strong, there is light at the end of the tunnel.

I am praying for you,
Kelly

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